Madame Web review: Sony’s Latest Misfire

Web isn’t nearly as offensive to the cinematic process as say a Jonah Hex (2010) or even Sony’s own Morbius (2022), but its impressive levels of apathy and mediocrity would make December’s Aquaman sequel blush in embarrassment.

Madame Web

Directed by S.J. Clarkson
Starring Dakota Johnson, Sydney Sweeney, Adam Scott, Emma Roberts, Isabela Merced, Celeste O’Connor

Runtime: 1 hour, 56 minutes

Synopsis

Cassandra Webb (Johnson) discovers that she has powers after a near-fatal accident, granting her the ability to see what’s going to happen before it occurs, giving her an edge to save the people around her. She’s quickly thrown into the fire as a trio of women (Sweeney, Merced, O’Connor) are targeted by a super-powered being (Tahar Rahim) who believes their trio will eventually kill him.

Sony Doesn’t Get It

I’m going to delve into this later with a full article on the superhero genre problem that we’re experiencing now, but as it concerns Sony: they simply don’t understand what people want. You may think that’s unfair, but every product they’ve made outside of allowing Marvel to create the Spider-Man movies showcases this. The box office, the critical panning, and audience scores of their projects firmly backs this up. Now I’m not saying Marvel has it all figured out either, as they are also losing their grasp on what audiences want. However Kevin Feige and the MCU have shown a level of quality over their 15 years of box office releases that Sony hasn’t come close to matching, and Madame Web is just the latest example of that issue.

If you never read the comics, this is a character that many 90s kids would become intimately familiar with during the animated Spider-Man (1994-1998) show. In the show, Madame Web prepares Spider-Man for the Secret Wars battle that would eventually happen, giving him guidance throughout multiple episodes to boost his confidence, sharpen his skills, and develop his wisdom. She acts as the woman in the chair, an all-powerful clairvoyant oracle, the Spider-Man equivalent of Charles Xavier. Now, that doesn’t mean she can’t have her own story, but it does mean it may not be the most compelling, especially when she’s rarely been a primary character.

It also means we miss an opportunity to let a wheelchair bound actress take on the Madame Web role, which is a key facet / backstory of her character. In fairness, I know this likely wasn’t discussed when Patrick Stewart’s portrayal as Charles Xavier came onto the scene back in X-Men (2001), and there’s an argument to be made because they each have dream / mind sequences where the characters mix between walking and wheelchair usage, and also experienced tragic events that took away their capacity to walk. However, for all the clamoring in recent years that various internet forums have made about giving more opportunities, this feels like a particularly awkward oversight. Again to be fair, I’m not sure what or if there even is a “right answer” but I know brushing it under the rug certainly isn’t right either.

The other frustrating thing is that focusing on Johnson’s Webb misses a major opportunity to let the other women in this story (Sweeney, O’Connor, Merced) shine with their own Spider-Woman stories. The film spends its time trying to setup a better film idea and trust me, I would have rather just watched 3 Spider-Woman figuring out their powers instead of twisting a minor character out of sorts.

As a result, it reeks of Sony just trying to cash in and justify their ownership of the Spider-Man properties while also being confusing to general audiences who aren’t avid MCU fans. Without being attached properly to the MCU, there’s even less reason for a casual viewer to care especially as the MCU regains its footing.

A Severe Lack of Energy

I’ll get to the problems with the script in a moment, but the largest problem with this film is that everyone seems to be sleepwalking through this movie. Johnson in particular strikes an incredibly antagonistic view towards the kids she’s protecting, which works for a bit until it becomes clear that the director or script never addressed or lightened this tone. Having a character be apprehensive to what’s going on around them or to them actually makes a ton of sense. Too many super hero films lately have characters excited or eager to take on a heroic mantle, almost like it’s a game, so this was a fresh take…however, you eventually need your lead character to gel or communicate that they have accepted and changed their tune, particularly when working with an ensemble. Technically, it does happen in Web, but it occurs so late that as we’re watching much of the third/fourth act, it still plays out with a similar tone and makes it hard to believe that she’s experienced any character growth.

Tahar Rahim as the main villain Ezekiel Sims might have had more impact if all his lines weren’t redubbed (hasn’t been confirmed yet, but it’s possible dialogue connecting this film to the MCU had to be cut). At least Johnson’s energy is explained as someone who has difficulty connecting to people, but that doesn’t help Rahim as his villain simply lacks motivation that’s compelling or it’s too abstract for anyone else to care. His key goal is to stop the 3 Spider-Women from killing him in the future and so he works on killing them now, before they ever get powers. On paper, that should be a compelling reason, but the film does nothing with it. Effectively, he keeps repeating the same line about his impending death, but we’re given no substantial hook for why we should care which makes his scenes boring.

The one bright spot are the trio of Spider-Woman played by Sweeney, O’Connor, and Merced, but like I mentioned above, that optimism is wasted because this is unfortunately a Madame Web movie. They have a few good moments together, but those are placed between so many egregiously bad scenes with Johnson that you will quickly forget that there were some scenes you liked.

Setup To Nowhere

I’m not going to sit here and nitpick every element of the script because that’s truly a waste of everyone’s time. However, the threads for this film’s uselessness are found there, because the script is more concerned about the surrounding elements of Madame Web and potentially setups for other Sony films instead of making the story about her journey. Thus, when key character moments do happen, or we’re lead to believe that she’s finally connecting with the Spider-team she’s helped save, the scenes just never connect. Hardcore Spider-Man fans may get a kick out of the Uncle Ben and Aunt May references woven throughout (Adam Scott plays a younger version of Uncle Ben), but ultimately those are annoying because on a meta level, we know those threads aren’t going to pay off within the MCU and they serve as major distractions for this film.

Conclusion / Recommendation

Madame Web attempts to set up and continue the Sony Spider-Man universe by adapting a character that has traditionally been on the sidelines, while taking away opportunities from characters that have longer histories and connections to the overall Spider-Man universe. That fundamental misunderstanding hampered the story from the beginning which means there’s nothing that the script, director SJ Clarkson, or the impressive ensemble can do to save it.

I would recommend that you just forget this existed and go watch Wonder Woman (2017), Birds of Prey (2020), Black Widow (2021), or Wakanda Forever (2022). Any one of these featuring women solo outings or team ups with stronger plots and better care for their characters than a single scene in Madame Web.

Score: 4.3 out of 10

  • Meandering Plot- 5
    • Even setting aside that this movie really shouldn’t exist, this script didn’t do enough to justify Madame Web being front and center, and doesn’t write anything compelling for the trio of Spider-Woman or Ezekiel Sims.
  • Visually Drab- 4
    • SJ Clarkson has directed better moments, particularly with other Marvel properties like The Defenders (2017). Unfortunately none of that flair exists here – though to be fair to Clarkson, she may have been hamstrung by Sony execs. The final fight scene in particular just strains whatever goodwill you had left, along with being visually confusing.
  • Zero Substance and Lifeless- 4
    • If you saw David Ayer’s Suicide Squad (2016) vs. James Gunn The Suicide Squad (2021), you can see what I mean regarding energy. Gunn is still dealing with some heavy moments, but there’s energy and life in the script and how he shoots it. Ayer’s version misses a lot of that and expects you to care when key moments occur between poorly fleshed out characters. That’s exactly what is happening with Web, we are told to care about something rather than being shown why we should and it hurts the whole experience.

We’re In A Weird Place Now

If you’ve been trying to understand the hatred this movie has received, there’s certainly some elements of misogyny baked into the proceedings as there’s a subset of comic book men that would love nothing more than to see women-led projects like Madame Web or The Marvels (2023) fall flat on their face. However, it’s important to note there’s also people using these films as ideological battle lines too, supporting them no matter what so they can get more of them. I’m definitely not equating the two, I think misogynistic trolls are certainly more problematic, but they aren’t the reason that no one came to watch this film. Just supporting something bad isn’t going to send the right message to Hollywood, an industry that has repeatedly shown they will squeeze a quick buck out of diversity if they don’t have to do a ton of work. I have more thoughts on this, but suffice it to say, Hollywood has plenty of evidence that women and POC folks can lead a movie, so don’t let them get away with making mediocre stories in the name of solidarity – they will take advantage of that sentiment every time.

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